We love them, and yet we couldn’t say how much or why exactly, but merely because things just fit into place. We love them, and yet we can’t share it with them, hoping however that they have long since understood it, the same way we understand them when they say something that makes no sense and yet we can find meaning in it.

Thus, for split seconds, we can forget that they are phantasms… and actually allow ourselves to dream.

Obsessive song of the day: Lara Fabian – The Dream Within.

And your head feels like it’s spinning too fast, and your eyes hurt and can’t take it, while your mind feels like it’s been stepped over by the rails of a tank. And your heart – writhing like a fish out of water, no more than a couple of spasms – now lies broken.

You cared too much, again.

Obsessive song of the day: Coma – Morphine.

She knew you, just as you knew her. And suddenly words were obsolete, while waves of feelings started to flood a dried out organism. Get reborn with them, through them, alongside them.

And, as time flows backwards in the hourglass, floating on the wings of the shifty night breeze, you let yourself fade in their embrace and start dancing to their tune…

Obsessive song of the day: Shpongle – Once Upon the Sea of Blissful Awareness.

It starts raining outside, with drops that do not come to wash away, to purify and to deliver, but to mourn. We hate rain because it carries discomfort and pain in its tears, we never let our soul dive into the tiny drops and experience its ultimate freedom. Thus, the rain mourns for our loss of perfection, while we grow small and miserable trying to take cover from it.

Smile, move along… and let us show you how beautiful the rainbows manufactured in icy labs can be.

Obsessive song of the day: Samael – Rain.

Sink into prayer, sink into mantras, sink into curses, sink into oblivion. Abysses enshroud, abysses entangle, abysses engulf…

Abysses deliver.

Obsessive song of the day: Pink Floyd – High Hopes.

They say that once there was a seven-headed goddess who had a different creature for each head and who gave away each and every one of her wild minds in order to experience humanity, but then withered away because they never told her the human mind was too simple to grasp all her feelings…

Show her a way and she will follow it, small steps taken one in a thousand years. Give her sand through her fingers and she will grow you an ocean, place tree roots on her path and she will climb mountains, tease her with ashes and she will rekindle ancient fires, grow her wings… and she will fall at your feet.

There was once a seven-headed goddess who was happy for a second. And then the liqueurs they were praising failed her.

Obsessive song of the day: Elend – A Staggering Moon.

One of them returned to me with eyes grey with grief and carrying on his shoulders a weight heavier than thoughts could bear. Tired, breathing slowly, abandoned himself in arms that could still feel their essence by means of pure faith and hands that were still able to soothe the pain. His eyes began glowing crimson as vengeful harbingers of the disease, scarred by the too much misery they have witnessed, ghostly holograms of what they once were.

He blinked for a split second – not an abyss, but a mirror so magnificent, victorious and powerful once more… then died in my arms.

Obsessive song of the day: VNV Nation – Rubicon.

Look back, think of the people that left a mark on your lifetime – a thin line, little segments, fancy images and lots of notes stashed away in an imaginary carton box of memories. You kissed them in silent moments of gratitude, you crumpled them when the hatred was too overwhelming and burned them when despair was devouring your very mind.

Look at yourself now and identify those patterns inside you, in your way of behaving, in your way of treating the other elements and beings with whom you interact. Discover them with amazement, with joy, with skepticism. With closed eyes. And acknowledge them, and respect them for what they are by never taking them for granted.

Round and round, ever outwards… ever ascending.

When you stare at the stars and try to count them and the night winds hiss of storms closing in, the icy air that enshrouds you becomes so thick and heavy that you’re stunned for a while. You can’t move, you can’t think, you can’t exist.

We close our dearest books with different feelings – of hope, of joy, of sadness, of scorn – but the feeling that will always be there is the emptiness that takes their place. No strength and no point in starting again: the words will be the same, the line of events follows its same old course like an old river flowing to an inconceivably vast ocean where it all ends.

Some simply can’t grasp the sensation. Some manage to catch a glimpse of horizons beyond but, horrified, cower back, wailing in agony. Others simply lose their faith and turn their faces to more earthly plains. I wonder what happens to those who defy the horizons and travel forth no matter how many times they’re close to drowning. They never seem to return…

So please forgive this heart
and these dreams that we’ve felt…

Hypocrisy – Slippin’ Away