Given:

• One cup of Twinings vanilla & coconut tea.


• One bag of Toblerone mini chocolates.


• Five Firefox tabs with websites regarding C++ libraries and applied fractal geometry.


• Eight Firefox tabs with information on company profiles and organigrams, management tips and websites of organizations related to company indexing according to various criteria.


• One OpenOffice Writer document autosaving itself every 10 minutes, even if it hasn’t changed for the last couple of hours.


• Three archived folders with book scans related to the above mentioned company stuff.

Required:

• Project sketch for the first chapter finished by 22 o’clock.


• Some general idea about the whole project structure.


• Going to bed at 22:30 or 23 o’clock at most.

Current state:

• Staring aimlessly and hopelessly.


• Yawning, overcome with boredom.


• Feeling like reading some more classical literature.


• A general wth-ish feeling.

Solutions:

• ?!

Categories: Thoughts
3 Comments »

We’re growing fond of ghosts, again. Over and over, perhaps, just like an ancient curse dwelling on the outline of our shadows. But they treat us in such delightful ways, that we forgive them for everything, even when they hurt our trust and our pride.

We love them, and yet we couldn’t say how much or why exactly, but merely because things just fit into place. We love them, and yet we can’t share it with them, hoping however that they have long since understood it, the same way we understand them when they say something that makes no sense and yet we can find meaning in it.

Thus, for split seconds, we can forget that they are phantasms… and actually allow ourselves to dream.

Obsessive song of the day: Lara Fabian – The Dream Within.

Categories: Nonsense
No Comments »

What do you do when everything you once knew and loved is gone before you even realize it? What do you do when you feel like everyone betrayed you? What do you do when you know you deserved so much more, for everything you gave away out of unconditioned love and sheer hope? What do you do when you don’t know what to do anymore? What do you do when all you would do is cry and scream – a mother who lost her child… all over again.

And your head feels like it’s spinning too fast, and your eyes hurt and can’t take it, while your mind feels like it’s been stepped over by the rails of a tank. And your heart – writhing like a fish out of water, no more than a couple of spasms – now lies broken.

You cared too much, again.

Obsessive song of the day: Coma – Morphine.

Categories: Nonsense
2 Comments »

The easiest way to replace addictions is through other – less harmful – addictions. And this seems to work with habits, as well as hobbies, spare time activities, job routines or even feelings.

Stars fall, stars die, stars get born… and we follow our own patterns, taking proud and graceful steps on the ways we uncover ahead.

Obsessive song of the day: Juno Reactor – Masters of the Universe.

Categories: Thoughts
No Comments »

Her words could have as well come from your lips, while her mind was so much like yours that it was almost funny to notice. And in her eyes, you could read the same dried oceans and the same warmth hidden deep inside, struggling to resurface above the self defensive icy barriers.

She knew you, just as you knew her. And suddenly words were obsolete, while waves of feelings started to flood a dried out organism. Get reborn with them, through them, alongside them.

Categories: Nonsense
3 Comments »