There are people who can’t or simply don’t want to get over various things, ideas, dreams or memories.

And death is not their final salvation and by far not what they seek. Death is just a cold fact which spawns only pain and disgust.

Who do you think you are to judge such matters? Who do you think you are to smear their choices and drag them through mud? Who do you think you are to define what happiness means for them and whether it’s “authentic” or not? What is that sort of happiness anyway and who do you think you are to define things for others in the first place?

So you don’t care and you hate us, alright, you’ve said it a dozen of times. But is it really us you’re telling that or is it just a desperate humming you keep repeating to your own mind so you’ll end up believing it yourself?

Categories: Nonsense
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Tonight I watched a marvellous movie – Der Himmel über Berlin (The Sky Over Berlin / Wings of Desire).

Time will heal everything. But what if time was the illness?...

No more words, I was just left speechless and I’ve just changed my all-time favourite movie.

Categories: Art/Culture, Entertainment
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I left one place only to find another pretty much the same.

So what if they’re smarter and older, I bump into the same silly jokes and teasing routine, prove you’re good, but you’re not, but what the hell, nobody cares anyway since you have big boobs, so what did you say your name was, again, too bad I’ll forget everything the next day, now shut up and go fetch me more beer.

Stop.

Rewind, rewind, rewind. Many years back. Five, six, seven, eight, nine who cares, we’re losing track of them anyway, just keep on rewinding till there’s nothing left, till the sun shines like it used to and the snow houses we’d build are white and pure like they have not been for so long. Drive backwards, all the roads, all those places, the trees, the mountains, the sand tickling our feet, you carrying me in your arms back to the hotel, the chess tables, the pool game we played together for the first time, the driving signs you taught me, the jokes you said, your eyes, your voice.

No, we won’t go to the zoo this time, but go rush and look into that box, isn’t the kitty lovely, do you like it, will you love it? And I loved it and I loved every one of them and cried for each when they were gone, when they died and buried them and they loved me, too.

Now I won’t go to that zoo again because one of them lies buried there and I’ve never went to the graveyard because he lies buried there, surrounded by the silent echoes left from the sound of those nails.

A soul torn to pieces, half gone, shut in there inside with him, deep below, high above…

Obsessive song of the day: Anathema – Release.

Categories: Nonsense
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Sin, beloved, as you have never sinned before, with your voluptuous curves and your magnificent waves of silky hair. Cover them in delight all the way to the worlds above and then in the ashes of perdition, tearing their souls to pieces.

Crows and violins will sing of your victory as you kneel down and kiss their wretched lips for one last time before the scavengers arrive to devour their exhausted flesh.

But when they’ll look up into your clouded eyes, they’ll see their redeemer and not the harbinger of death.

And then rise, my glorious Magdalene of the wicked, and shed a tear for all the sighs you’ve stolen…

Obsessive song of the day: Ulver – Wild Cat.

Categories: Nonsense
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Heat. Delirious heat. And dazzling light.

But I feel good again.

I’m back on tracks with my job and I’m actually happy doing my assignments, I’m glad I didn’t give it up when I felt like doing so. Aside from the news agencies and translations, I’ll also be handling a part of the Romanian Sci-Tech news for the time being. Now I can actually direct people to J.ro when referring to my job, not just to P.com.

So I’ve got my share of dreams and joy, charged up my batteries again and was able to smile back sincerely after quite a long while.

Obsessive song of the day: Realogic – Lights.

Categories: Thoughts
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